I worked my butt off for HER HUSBAND. Thank you for the encouragement and it really does help just knowing I’m not alone. Physically, mentally and emotionally. Thanks for for doing this Everyday Mom Super Bundle sale. Libby that is an awesome idea. Nothing big like buying them stuff but small things like the right sippy cup, letting them pick out their own bedtime stories, kisses at night, etc. by Thanks for sharing :), Yes yes yes! Anyways I started following your routine and we just sat in bed and had what I told him was “quiet time.” We sat and read and made a fort and had warm milk. Your sale is serendipitous. I carefully read through your schedules and decided to try it. You don’t know tired. This is to help those who are stay a home. The job of being a mom is very hard for anyone no matter how many children you have, but the rewards are worth it. I don’t know why everyone seems to think this way of living is fair . My mom is also very tired most of the time ... good bloodwork, good thyroid test, not depressed, GREAT appetite. It goes in a million different directions because we’re managing more than just kids and shopping lists. Yup, for me. There is pretty much no need to even include my spouse as he lacks in many areas than I can mention. He took them to the local pool & I joined them there later. Even though she’s at home, the house still isn’t clean. I tried to go back in an edit that comment…i have one 4 year old grandson, not 4 of them! Constantly non stop exhausted and always starving. 4am (daylight savings time just fell back) and my 3 & 5 year old are in full crazy mode… I had to turn to my cell phone internet to not weep while I lay on their floor and they build a cardboard block tower around me. Leslie Andrews My daughter is very mobile and in to everything, she is a climber and I seem to have pulled something in my neck from all the lugging bags and the baby around and constantly picking things up or retrieving her from whatever piece of furniture she has found to crawl on top of. You do have a exhausting, difficult job! It is good and right, but dadgummit, it is exhausting. Tiredness is common for all moms-to-be. We in SA have school holidays. But don’t come on to an article to support certain situations if it does not pertain to you. That tired feeling? So, if you want to lie down, don’t fight it. This post was eye opening and should be given to every Mom out there. Part of the reason she’s so tired is because she’s struggling to keep the part of her that’s not labeled “Mom” above water; taking her out and romancing her a bit helps her find it, and handling all the details like calling the sitter? 0 shares. I made the girls bed, pillows and dolls how they must be, gave them baths and got clothes ready for everyone. Anemia may be caused by deficiency of vitamins or minerals, internal bleeding or chronic diseases. That guilt surpasses the stress. I wish we could all get together in a big garden and share the tasks. Hi Jody, I am a new member and I feel like I have so many different questions it’s hard to know where to start. I so LOVE you for this! Everything moms do places a heavy mental load on their brains. Women who are at “that time” of the month are susceptible to anemia as blood is lost during menstruation. Yes, all that. I had no idea what I was doing and couldn’t get her to sleep in her crib until I found your blog. But I also,work for the business as dispatcher, accountant, Secretary, etc. I feel like you would appreciate this, ever had something like this happen? But my goodness…I pray things improve with my energy level! Your perfect description of Mothering life brought tears to my eyes. I kept hearing this until I found someone who ordered blood tests. Also this post is amazing as I have been suffering from extreme panick attacks after my second girl was born and I am a therapist and even with my knowledge and tons of advice etc here I am with your post finally understanding why I am having so much anxiety … and this helps me so much so I can be more forgiving of myself for being so worried all the time ugh I’m writing so much but I just want u to know u have changed my life with ur words and I will be following u and reading everything!!!! I am definitely highly sensitive to my environmental stimuli which, with lots of loud kids, can be so trying. Thanks for this article! I will be interested in seeing if any working moms have a different view of SAHMs now with all this COVID-19 “shelter-in-place” going on. Every time I think I need to go back working, the instances when something went really wrong reminds me that I still have to safeguard my little ones a little longer. I almost always got called out of bed at least once, usually it was twice. We can’t say to each other “You don’t know tired!” because it’s all subjective. Hi! Then we come home to take care of all those things that didn’t get done while we are away, organize for tomorrow, run errands, transport children and hopefully steal some time for ourselves (any our spouses). I was a special education teacher for severn years before I had kids and now, I stay at home with my three kiddos, three and under. Thanks for putting into words the reality of our days being hypervigilant! At the same time you love all your young babies it is just really flipping hard, isn’t it? Today I said I feel so crazy to my husband, while we were eating dinner. So, for parents, hyper-vigilance is basically being in a heightened state of awareness, fight-or-flight and protection mode on behalf of our children who are too young to do it for themselves properly, if at all. Amen!! I appreciate your blog and, as a working mom, was hoping there would be a little encouragement for us too…and I noticed it in your responses to others. Are you just out to get stay at home moms? I took what opportunities there were, always, but if it’s not there, or it’s spotty and not offered in ways that really work for me, then it’s not there…. We spend all day thinking about work AS WELL as our children. your words are so moving I can’t stop crying but I am so happy to read that other moms are not doing pre- k either and I want my girls 3 and 4 to have more experiences with me like nature and travel etc right now than a classroom! Can someone give me some advice on what to do? :). I think your article applies to more than just SAHMs. What a woman! Come on folks! I was just highlighting the nature of watching someone else (or multiple someone else’s) all day. After Christmas my mom has become very tired. I can’t possibly because I’m not you, just as you’re not me. She wakes up at 5AM for work, and she says she's not tired when she wakes up. This is spot-on. I have zero understanding for stay-at-home moms, who complain that it’s too much for them. Margo, I had a feeling it didn’t get “better” but only got “different” :). As glucose is the staple fuel of the body, it is not utilized properly in patients with type 2 diabetes as the absence of insulin causes the glucose to build up in the body. I will say though that since reading your blog I am really focusing on remembering that every moment is a learning \ experience for my son and I try to take a breath and count to ten. Plus the mental stress that you feel because you are not the one making money and you feel guilty and lazy for not working even though you are working physically all day . Then when he was at vaction n saw hiw much work was taking care of the baby n home he was shock. I still have to get dinner, the housework, and appointments done when I get home. Stay at home mom, work from home entrepreneur, working outside the home. Plus I do not have family to help out since they all live far away. Read: 5 Things Emotionally Exhausted Moms Need To Hear. I’m now a certified health coach and would love to help all if for free if anyone’s interested I feel 15 years younger these days have mental clarity and am always happy. Thank you so much for putting these together. Sometimes you have to, even if you feel you shouldn’t need to. There were years I was certainly hyper-vigilant round the clock because my daughter has epilepsy and is most prone to seizures overnight. I am 29 & have been married for 8 years. I am on my feet and I don’t get a break. I just found this article and just about died. Download, print, and start sleeping better tonight. – Thanks! Wow yes!!!! But I work part-time, and that means, I do not miss important steps in the development of my kids. Parenting is a hard job whether a parent works or stays home. I was only speaking of my experience working before children, most certainly not all jobs! Stay strong, mama! I am tired because it’s 2:00 in the afternoon and I’ve survived on coffee and the last of my daughter’s crusty cold oatmeal so far today. Everytime I try to tell my husband that I need to watch the kids because they can end up doing anything, he just laughs it out and calls me an over protective, paranoid mother. Its the rediculous 6 wee holidays and im dreading another day of shear energetic kids from 6am onwrds…BUT im not ready to sleep yet :/ …’what the actual f$#*!’.. and to make mTters ten times worse im feeling so self conscious and seco d guessi g if my partner (who i know deeep deeep down would never be unfaithful) however im second guessing him anyway. What’s that saying… “I don’t want to ‘sleep like a baby;, I want to ‘sleep like my husband.'”. So I know. But a short holliday without th kids might help. If you did you would never have said that. Great points. Were Kids From The 70’s and 80’s Tougher Than Kids Today? There are some downsides – the continuos breast pumping, angry customers or bosses, sudden deadlines, all-nighters, kids’ tantrums, and kids being looked after a bit differently than I would do it. But I cannot do that, I have a schedule and she needs to eat on time, watch TV for just an hour and sleep when it’s nap time. An important factor is the kind of job. And consequently, he was flustered because I couldn’t come up with a way that he could help. Start here, friend. I am tired of the battle between working outside home moms and stay at home moms. The one I baby sit is a whiner she is whining for everything (eating time, nap time, for go outside and play, for go in the car, for use the potty, for watch tv….she whines all day and she is with me 8 am 7 pm) my 15 months old just start to do the stairs by herself up and down ( I have fates everywhere) but she is not talking yet (except for mom, dad, grandpa, grandma) so when she want something and you don’t get it at the first time she screams but she is the quiet one, she can play alone for hours. I have 2 months, 3 yr and 5 yr boys and they are everywhere. She gets off at 2:30PM and she's just tired. But after what you said, I can now articulate why being a stay at home parent is so thoroughly exhausting. Read: The Ultimate Guide To Having A Mother’s Helper You’ll Love. We are all exhausted because our kids didn’t drink bleach today. But a woman works 3 times as hard as a man, I don’t see how that is equality, or partnership. Click here and learn breakthrough strategies that’ll help you feel peace immediately. I have one 13 month old daughter and work part time, she has recently started waking up at 6:00 AM on the dot and has dropped her afternoon nap. I just wanted to stay home till my youngest starts full-time school. Why are moms of toddlers always busy? Ha. I would like to see men take more responsibility in general, I think they are just not taught to be helpful and are taught that once they get married they won’t ever have to do dishes again. I was always present but it was like a fog. Staying at home full time I feel like my brain is on constant overdrive, thinking about the safety worries while also dealing with every tantrum or potential tantrum or even good behavior moments. I started making lists of small things that take 5 minutes or less to feed a mothers physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs. Why are all women and moms exhausted ? Unless you’ve done both, it’s hard to keep perspective. I skip lunch many a day, I actually do forget sometimes. It makes me feel like I’m not alone and reminds me to try to take time out for me and be okay with this :). Great, well written article by the way! You are too right, Erin! I am so exhausted!!!! Sorry for all the things that I said when I was tired (and hungry). And you made me cry. He is very pale skinned anyway, but he has bags under his eyes? that is ridiculous. I am a home based worker for a market research firm, even though I have no children, I can relate to the stress of Hyper-vigilance a mom suffers. Sleep deprivation is non transferable. I had just had a baby this May 1st and also have a 2 and 4 year old and, Even my marriage seemed like it was on the brink of extinction and this had happened in 2 weeks! ???? A cheater, I imagine. PC: Google Images labeled with reuse: Engaging a 6-year-old is not a big deal but handling a toddler will take up more energy. Such a great way to put it… worry wears you out! And so many other precious moments. We have no idea how bad the other is feeling. I’m running through what I’m going to say to calm down the screaming toddler or whether I should ignore her this time or whether how I can prevent this tantrum next time. I get blamed for anything broken or damaged because I wasn’t keeping a good enough eye on them. Somebody’s always hungry, not all of them at the same time though. I am a multi-tasker to the extreme. Love you all. I wish I had life changing advice about how to not feel tired, but all I know that really works for me is consistent time alone and breaks from the responsibilities of life. Not only are you tired, but I also find that I haven’t got the energy or motivation somedays. The commute from your bed to the kitchen table is slightly too short to be of good use. :). Commutes to and from work offer time to process, read a book or relax.” It sounds like working a 9-5 job is easy and relaxing. Using dishes ,making messes , etc. So, thank you!!!! It is certainly different depending on child dynamics as well! And when they start school I still worry if they are being bullied, how their day is going, if they’re getting frustrated with a subject, if everyone if being nice to them, if they will get hurt on the playground. But with 4 under 4 there is always someone crying, needing a bottle or the potty, or making noises that make me sit up (out of a dead sleep) and listen closely until I know they are not getting out of bed. @Erin, yes! Aww, Sarah :) Yes, a mama can’t help but be tired! I am just saying that Stay at home moms have a luxury to working moms and by stay at home moms ranting they have it hard to spend time with their kids!? We both work and I find I just don’t have the energy that I used to. Then need to be a good wife and be all cheered up when husband comes home. Ha! It is possible to do it and NOT BE TIRED. My biggest beef, or trouble is when moms of older children tell me to enjoy it while I can because they grow up so fast! Its called gaining independence and organising your own life. Oh my goodness yes precisely describes my life to a T, I am always so tired I don’t sleep well at night on top of it all because even at night your still worried about the kids, or the house or upcoming event etc…and a lot of people don’t understand that your constantly watching, listening, taking care of everything never a moment to breath and if you do happen to doze off on the couch your pretty much still listening to what the kids are doing, I have 4 children(5,5,5,9) 2 of the 5 year olds are mine the other 5 and 9 year old are step children- we don’t have all 4 all the time but I always have 2 of 5 year olds and sometimes all the 5 year olds and every summer all 4 kids. Phone calls can be made without worrying that a sudden screech or disconnection will occur. So yes, I expect to be tired the rest of my life as well :P. April, I’m with you actually. Clothes, is ignorant. I would NEVER rant that I have it hard to a single working mother, that would make me sound crazy. I need time for my 3 year old too. I think to myself, you go sister! Haha yes, 100% agree! Multi-tasking and not having enough “me time” really hit home for me. Misd you too. I read numerous amounts of your entries and applied them to my home life and I am happy to say. I stumbled upon your blog one morning after praying night after night for God to fix my home! Also, I disagree that my ride home is a time to relax. You put it perfectly! My awareness ifs in over drive! I know you are doing double duty, girl. I will say though that since reading your blog I am really focusing on remembering that every moment is a learning \ experience for my son and I try to take a breath and count to ten. I would stay up until the last late feed, say 11pm, then I could go to bed and sleep all night. No matter if u just pulled a 16 hr shift, you STILL get to punch out and walk away from that building . You think that you’ll never forget any of it… but you will unless you have little momentos to help jog your memory. -no matter how stressful any job you could possibly have, you have one thing that I envy: the ability to clock in and out . A Texas mom is delighting parents on Facebook after nailing why moms of newborns are so tired, in a series of hand-drawn comics. Chased them all to bed now as daddy went to bed to sleep. 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